Since I posted the link to the Minus One, might as well sing to the lyrics I post here... And realise that in the lyrics, the essence of all emo is found...
Take my hand
Tell me what you are feeling
Understand
This is just the beginning
Although I have to go
It makes me feel like crying
I don't know when I'll see you again
Darling leave a light on for me
I'll be there before you close the door
To give you all the love that you need
Darling leave a light on for me
'cause when the world takes me away
You are still the air that I breathe
I can't explain I don't know
Just how far I have to go
But darling I'll keep the key
Just leave a light on for me
Yes I know
What I'm asking is crazy
You could go
Just get tired of waiting
But if I lose your love
Torn out by my desire
That would be the one regret of my life
Just like a spark lights up the dark
Baby that's your heart
Friday, May 29, 2009
Fatigue of the Intelligent Kind...
“Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.”
– Ernest Hemingway (1899 - 1961)
How true.
For to know more than you should comes with a cost.
Whether we like it or not, all heads turn our direction when we are considered the knowledgeable.
Whether we enjoy it, the tasks don’t seem to go away if we don’t inspire it to move.
And whether or not we seem to care, people always feel that the ball is in our court.
Does this always mean that the intelligent will have to find the way out for the others all the time?
Would it be justifiable to say that this group of elite should be the masters of others’ fate?
And it is so difficult to allow us the space we need to do what we want to do, when we want to do it with the people that matter to us most?
The challenge is that the key factor here is dependency.
The intelligent ones are usually the ones that are depended upon to make intelligent & intellectual decisions, whether or not it is necessary to make them.
The others simply could not comprehend beyond their level of intelligence to learn that all things do not necessarily revolve around what can be done & their inability to get things done.
As such, the easy way out for these people is to just simply to rely on those who know because by default, “They will do a good job, easier life for all of us…”
Haih…
Penat, tau?
If there are questions in life we hope to find the answers to, it’ll be these:
Where does this leave us, the kind that is considered intelligent?
What’s our refuge from the ever-dependent people we bump into everyday?
How do we find the outlet to escape from all these responsibility, whether or not we choose to receive them?
Some say “the smarts” is a curse…
What say you?
– Ernest Hemingway (1899 - 1961)
How true.
For to know more than you should comes with a cost.
Whether we like it or not, all heads turn our direction when we are considered the knowledgeable.
Whether we enjoy it, the tasks don’t seem to go away if we don’t inspire it to move.
And whether or not we seem to care, people always feel that the ball is in our court.
Does this always mean that the intelligent will have to find the way out for the others all the time?
Would it be justifiable to say that this group of elite should be the masters of others’ fate?
And it is so difficult to allow us the space we need to do what we want to do, when we want to do it with the people that matter to us most?
The challenge is that the key factor here is dependency.
The intelligent ones are usually the ones that are depended upon to make intelligent & intellectual decisions, whether or not it is necessary to make them.
The others simply could not comprehend beyond their level of intelligence to learn that all things do not necessarily revolve around what can be done & their inability to get things done.
As such, the easy way out for these people is to just simply to rely on those who know because by default, “They will do a good job, easier life for all of us…”
Haih…
Penat, tau?
If there are questions in life we hope to find the answers to, it’ll be these:
Where does this leave us, the kind that is considered intelligent?
What’s our refuge from the ever-dependent people we bump into everyday?
How do we find the outlet to escape from all these responsibility, whether or not we choose to receive them?
Some say “the smarts” is a curse…
What say you?
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Directions in Life: Merely Words?
"To get to where you'd wanna go, firstly you've gotta know where you are..."
I’m sure this is not the first time any of you would have heard this.
But I can’t repeat this phrase in my head more often than these few couple of days.
To those who drive, you’d probably figure that when you turn your steering to the left, it is only expected that the car will turn that direction.
To those car-modification enthusiasts whom I have had the privilege to be acquainted with, knowing where to point the car “properly” would mean you would most certainly need to install what is known as a strut-bar or an undercar anti-roll bar.
Or what about those “Global Positioning System” gadgets that we all fondly call GPS?
Do we rely on them enough to lose our way if we don’t carry them along?
What if the GPS goes into “emo mood” & take you around in circles, like I have had the fortune to experience last night, much to the delight of the Angel who couldn’t help but laugh all the way till we raised our belief level to trust the signboards & subsequently found our way out of the predicament?
Well, if the sense of direction can be enhanced with a couple of modifications & gadgets, don’t you think there would be virtually nothing that cannot be achieved, simply because knowing where to head will probably get you there, safe & sound?
But we know that live is not just about maps, junctions, signboards, speed limits, emo GPSs…
It is also about knowing when to slow down when the speed bump approaches, to put on an indicator light when shifting lanes, of winding down the window or just tapping the horn lightly to acknowledge the familiar ride of our friends’ when we spot them, so on so forth…
So why is it such a hassle to even make the right judgement when it comes to life?
Which way do we take?
How fast should we go?
Do we trust our GPSs (of which from now on, I’d use sparingly)?
Do we really need to acknowledge spotting that friend while we drive past the ride?
More importantly, do we need to say what we feel or how deeply we feel about someone or something just so that the direction is not lost?
Is it really that important to express them?
You decide.
For directions in life are merely words.
So, what say you?
I’m sure this is not the first time any of you would have heard this.
But I can’t repeat this phrase in my head more often than these few couple of days.
To those who drive, you’d probably figure that when you turn your steering to the left, it is only expected that the car will turn that direction.
To those car-modification enthusiasts whom I have had the privilege to be acquainted with, knowing where to point the car “properly” would mean you would most certainly need to install what is known as a strut-bar or an undercar anti-roll bar.
Or what about those “Global Positioning System” gadgets that we all fondly call GPS?
Do we rely on them enough to lose our way if we don’t carry them along?
What if the GPS goes into “emo mood” & take you around in circles, like I have had the fortune to experience last night, much to the delight of the Angel who couldn’t help but laugh all the way till we raised our belief level to trust the signboards & subsequently found our way out of the predicament?
Well, if the sense of direction can be enhanced with a couple of modifications & gadgets, don’t you think there would be virtually nothing that cannot be achieved, simply because knowing where to head will probably get you there, safe & sound?
But we know that live is not just about maps, junctions, signboards, speed limits, emo GPSs…
It is also about knowing when to slow down when the speed bump approaches, to put on an indicator light when shifting lanes, of winding down the window or just tapping the horn lightly to acknowledge the familiar ride of our friends’ when we spot them, so on so forth…
So why is it such a hassle to even make the right judgement when it comes to life?
Which way do we take?
How fast should we go?
Do we trust our GPSs (of which from now on, I’d use sparingly)?
Do we really need to acknowledge spotting that friend while we drive past the ride?
More importantly, do we need to say what we feel or how deeply we feel about someone or something just so that the direction is not lost?
Is it really that important to express them?
You decide.
For directions in life are merely words.
So, what say you?
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
ARRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
It’s such a challenging day at the blogspot today, thanks mainly to TMNet.
I have actually completed a piece about leadership.
Those close to me would know that any entry into my blog is something I really cherish, mean & feel.
As such, I may start an hour beforehand as it takes about that duration to finally complete one & feel totally excited when I click on the “Publish Post” button.
But after I completed my earlier piece, as I clicked the “moment of truth”, the internet connection conveniently died on me. The page expired & could not be refreshed.
Worse, the post disappeared.
Neither was I able to fully utilize the Draft section of blogspot.
The draft disappeared as well, after I have right-clicked on it to “Select All” in order for me to copy & paste it in, just in case…
Oh, what a ride!
Well, looking at it & as the Angel said: “Maybe it’s not meant to be published”…
Maybe, let’s just wait if the synapses would want to connect at that same place so that I would be again inspired to write about it & let everyone have a share of it.
Watch this space.
I can choose to let this ruin the rest of the day, much to the discomfort of those who would share it with me.
Or I can seize this opportunity to do some thinking of how to avoid this in future…
In the meantime, have an awesome & meaningful evening ahead.
I know I will… :)
I have actually completed a piece about leadership.
Those close to me would know that any entry into my blog is something I really cherish, mean & feel.
As such, I may start an hour beforehand as it takes about that duration to finally complete one & feel totally excited when I click on the “Publish Post” button.
But after I completed my earlier piece, as I clicked the “moment of truth”, the internet connection conveniently died on me. The page expired & could not be refreshed.
Worse, the post disappeared.
Neither was I able to fully utilize the Draft section of blogspot.
The draft disappeared as well, after I have right-clicked on it to “Select All” in order for me to copy & paste it in, just in case…
Oh, what a ride!
Well, looking at it & as the Angel said: “Maybe it’s not meant to be published”…
Maybe, let’s just wait if the synapses would want to connect at that same place so that I would be again inspired to write about it & let everyone have a share of it.
Watch this space.
I can choose to let this ruin the rest of the day, much to the discomfort of those who would share it with me.
Or I can seize this opportunity to do some thinking of how to avoid this in future…
In the meantime, have an awesome & meaningful evening ahead.
I know I will… :)
Monday, May 25, 2009
What's the Difference in Change?
"Sometimes you meet someone who changes your life; but that doesn't mean your life has to change"...
In life, we meet a lot of people.
Unknowingly, we cross the path of many people without realising if we would affect them in some way or another.
At the cafe for breakfast, at work in the office or when we attend to an appointment, during lunch, after office hours at the mamak stall while having a cuppa after a long day, at the restaurant when it's time to have a decend meal before heading on home, etc....
Some, we remember their names.
Others, if we have crossed paths, their faces.
Most of the time, we play a role in changing others without realising it.
Imagine ordering the last piece of chicken, leaving the person next in the queue having to settle for fish, only to be served an uncooked one, resulting in food poisoning.
Or taking a little too long at the petrol pump, causing certain uneasiness to the car behind us, but in the end saved the driver's life because you made him leave the pump a few seconds later just to avoid an accident at the exit of the station...
Extreme examples?
Think again...
However, closer to heart, it could be our family members, the acquaintances, ex-schoolmates, friends, soul-mates, or even our - what do we call them - life partners?...
We know that nothing is permanent, that all relationship(s) will somehow end no matter what, either through choice, change of events or through the natural process of life & death.
When these people enter our lives, to a certain extend our lives change.
Whether for the better or for the worse, we can neither doubt their influence nor deny their effect they will have on us.
Expectations, circumstances, situations that we can either control or we can't, dictate that these changes will take place in a subtle manner in most cases, or profoundly in many more.
So, how do we live up to this?
Do we change as well, adapting to the needs & wants of these people?
Do we change because they are there to change our lives?
Do we change because we need to make these people happy & we want to keep them around us?
Or do we change because it would simply mean we would be redundant, stuck with the unpleasant circumstances we brought on ourselves & head towards a downward spiral if we don't?
Does it matter if these people are newly-made acquaintances, a sibling, a soul-mate or a close friend of a thousand years?
Or best still, what if the change is so necessary that it would mean your reputation & all that you have build in your life?
In life people walk in & out of our sands of time.
But only those who matter will leave a deep footprint in our hearts.
How often does this happen to you?
In life, we meet a lot of people.
Unknowingly, we cross the path of many people without realising if we would affect them in some way or another.
At the cafe for breakfast, at work in the office or when we attend to an appointment, during lunch, after office hours at the mamak stall while having a cuppa after a long day, at the restaurant when it's time to have a decend meal before heading on home, etc....
Some, we remember their names.
Others, if we have crossed paths, their faces.
Most of the time, we play a role in changing others without realising it.
Imagine ordering the last piece of chicken, leaving the person next in the queue having to settle for fish, only to be served an uncooked one, resulting in food poisoning.
Or taking a little too long at the petrol pump, causing certain uneasiness to the car behind us, but in the end saved the driver's life because you made him leave the pump a few seconds later just to avoid an accident at the exit of the station...
Extreme examples?
Think again...
However, closer to heart, it could be our family members, the acquaintances, ex-schoolmates, friends, soul-mates, or even our - what do we call them - life partners?...
We know that nothing is permanent, that all relationship(s) will somehow end no matter what, either through choice, change of events or through the natural process of life & death.
When these people enter our lives, to a certain extend our lives change.
Whether for the better or for the worse, we can neither doubt their influence nor deny their effect they will have on us.
Expectations, circumstances, situations that we can either control or we can't, dictate that these changes will take place in a subtle manner in most cases, or profoundly in many more.
So, how do we live up to this?
Do we change as well, adapting to the needs & wants of these people?
Do we change because they are there to change our lives?
Do we change because we need to make these people happy & we want to keep them around us?
Or do we change because it would simply mean we would be redundant, stuck with the unpleasant circumstances we brought on ourselves & head towards a downward spiral if we don't?
Does it matter if these people are newly-made acquaintances, a sibling, a soul-mate or a close friend of a thousand years?
Or best still, what if the change is so necessary that it would mean your reputation & all that you have build in your life?
In life people walk in & out of our sands of time.
But only those who matter will leave a deep footprint in our hearts.
How often does this happen to you?
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Work, Strive, Attain, Enjoy...
"Success is the Progressive Realization of a Worthwhile Dream!"
I was acquainted to this phrase some time back in my life.
And being quite young & hot-blooded those days when I heard it, it made almost no sense.
Just like the saying I related earlier about how facts don't matter if the dream is big enough, which to many folks, is incoherent & utterly rubbish.
For the true dream is not just about the dream car, dream house, dream vacation, dream girl, etc...
I remember that when I had to learn, unlearn & relearn a lot of stuff to truly understand what these sayings mean, it was a very painful process.
Because those who cared did not want to see the changes, and those who changed no longer cared.
But all these years of building the dream, all the principles picked up & the reputation I may have built, nothing would make a more lasting impression at the back of my head than the fact that dreams are real.
However, the elements & principles into making that worthwhile dream attainable is the true test of character...
Without working for it, we cannot lay claim to it.
Without striving, each day takes us further away from it.
When we attain it, will we be truly able to recognise it?
And when the day comes to enjoy it, would it really matter anymore?
I have reminded myself that nobody in this world has got the right to steal away my dreams & pull me away from my goals.
For the true test of character is that when the curtains are down, when the stage is already cleared & when nobody else is still watching, the right things are done & the principles upheld.
My journey to even identify my real true dream has gone through a rough & winding route.
But I can gladly say, with my head held high, "I love every minute of it & nobody will take this away from me, unless I do so choose."
So, what's your story, Morning Glory?
I was acquainted to this phrase some time back in my life.
And being quite young & hot-blooded those days when I heard it, it made almost no sense.
Just like the saying I related earlier about how facts don't matter if the dream is big enough, which to many folks, is incoherent & utterly rubbish.
For the true dream is not just about the dream car, dream house, dream vacation, dream girl, etc...
I remember that when I had to learn, unlearn & relearn a lot of stuff to truly understand what these sayings mean, it was a very painful process.
Because those who cared did not want to see the changes, and those who changed no longer cared.
But all these years of building the dream, all the principles picked up & the reputation I may have built, nothing would make a more lasting impression at the back of my head than the fact that dreams are real.
However, the elements & principles into making that worthwhile dream attainable is the true test of character...
Without working for it, we cannot lay claim to it.
Without striving, each day takes us further away from it.
When we attain it, will we be truly able to recognise it?
And when the day comes to enjoy it, would it really matter anymore?
I have reminded myself that nobody in this world has got the right to steal away my dreams & pull me away from my goals.
For the true test of character is that when the curtains are down, when the stage is already cleared & when nobody else is still watching, the right things are done & the principles upheld.
My journey to even identify my real true dream has gone through a rough & winding route.
But I can gladly say, with my head held high, "I love every minute of it & nobody will take this away from me, unless I do so choose."
So, what's your story, Morning Glory?
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Building Dreams, Crushing Lives...
"If the Dreams are BIG enough, the facts don't count!"
Dreams are meant to be the fuel of our lives.
Without dreams, it would mean that we are already dead from the neck up.
Some dreams would actually propel us to exceed ourselves, to inspire us to put in extra effort, some even make us extraordinary & take us places or experiences that are beyond our wildest, well, imagination...
I am somehow not talking about those that we experience during R.E.M. after a long & tiring day of staying awake.
But what if achieving that dream would mean crushing everything that you have stood for or what your life meaning is all about?
What if you would have to throw everything you have built to the wind?
Would that still be considered a dream?
A lot of us fail to understand the difference between goals, plans, fantasies.
Most of us just say: "I wish I had..." or "It'll be nice to have..." or "Wouldn't it be good to..."
Will it be too difficult to put your heart, mind and soul into something worthwhile & say:
"Now, that's what I will set out to achieve."
Difficult?
Yes.
But imagine your world without dreams.
So, what's yours?
Dreams are meant to be the fuel of our lives.
Without dreams, it would mean that we are already dead from the neck up.
Some dreams would actually propel us to exceed ourselves, to inspire us to put in extra effort, some even make us extraordinary & take us places or experiences that are beyond our wildest, well, imagination...
I am somehow not talking about those that we experience during R.E.M. after a long & tiring day of staying awake.
But what if achieving that dream would mean crushing everything that you have stood for or what your life meaning is all about?
What if you would have to throw everything you have built to the wind?
Would that still be considered a dream?
A lot of us fail to understand the difference between goals, plans, fantasies.
Most of us just say: "I wish I had..." or "It'll be nice to have..." or "Wouldn't it be good to..."
Will it be too difficult to put your heart, mind and soul into something worthwhile & say:
"Now, that's what I will set out to achieve."
Difficult?
Yes.
But imagine your world without dreams.
So, what's yours?
Friday, May 22, 2009
Let Go, Start Living...
"Sometimes you must let go of the life you've planned in order to make room for the life ahead of you"...
Wow.
Got that from a book I was browsing at the MPH of BTS today.
Makes me wonder, whether the things we hang on to really is all that worth it.
Some people call it the bane of memories, some would take it as the merit of knowing how to plan.
While some would take it as it comes, some could never live to see it coming.
No matter what, we were all meant to choose to do something.
Even choosing not to is a choice.
So, defines what others would know as ambition.
And to many people who don't achieve theirs, they would rather hang on till they breathe their last...
We are often so caught up in the things which we look forward to, that we expect, that we have planned to happen. How often is it that we learn to relieve ourselves from all these & reflect;
"Is this what I really want?"
For one thing that I've learned, is that in order to be who or what I am supposed to, I'd need to do some forgetting;
- Forget the past achievements otherwise I'd be so stuck with feeling good about myself bringing about complacency,
- Forget about what is expected of me in the beginning, otherwise I'd be fashioned towards what others would like me to be, not what I'd like myself to be,
- Forget about the things which would bring me down, lighten up & move on to greater heights...
I seriously feel that it is all beginning to make sense.
Of course, there are certainly things that we should hold on to.
But what do you think?
Wouldn't it be a happier world if we all learned how to let go & start living?
Wow.
Got that from a book I was browsing at the MPH of BTS today.
Makes me wonder, whether the things we hang on to really is all that worth it.
Some people call it the bane of memories, some would take it as the merit of knowing how to plan.
While some would take it as it comes, some could never live to see it coming.
No matter what, we were all meant to choose to do something.
Even choosing not to is a choice.
So, defines what others would know as ambition.
And to many people who don't achieve theirs, they would rather hang on till they breathe their last...
We are often so caught up in the things which we look forward to, that we expect, that we have planned to happen. How often is it that we learn to relieve ourselves from all these & reflect;
"Is this what I really want?"
For one thing that I've learned, is that in order to be who or what I am supposed to, I'd need to do some forgetting;
- Forget the past achievements otherwise I'd be so stuck with feeling good about myself bringing about complacency,
- Forget about what is expected of me in the beginning, otherwise I'd be fashioned towards what others would like me to be, not what I'd like myself to be,
- Forget about the things which would bring me down, lighten up & move on to greater heights...
I seriously feel that it is all beginning to make sense.
Of course, there are certainly things that we should hold on to.
But what do you think?
Wouldn't it be a happier world if we all learned how to let go & start living?
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Me: the Mood-swinging Rotty...
"A Setback is a Set-up for a Comeback"...
Familiar?
I heard this phrase some time back.
Been thinking, all this while, I am a good practitioner of its essence.
These few days, with so many things happening & all the emotions that have been going to & fro, I was proven wrong.
For a self-proclaimed egolomaniac, I found that I really did not have such a thick face.
Not for the ability to handle rejections, make good emotional judgements and certainly not accepting what I would consider, a defeat.
But the Angel was quick to assure me, it was not a defeat.
It was a matter of circumstances...
The judgement she passed was not going to be not an easy one for her as well.
Ah well...
In the course of all this turmoil, endless hours of soul-searching & heart-wrenching conversations, many people got hurt.
I can only hope that nobody got badly scarred.
Especially those I care for the most.
I would describe myself to be articulate.
I have also been described as a person with exceptional communication skills.
But alas, the Great Communicator has failed to communicate the most basic of needs;
The Need for Love.
There hasn't been many ocassions which I would be caught withot a line to rescue myself out of a situation, but during this ordeal, I was amazed at how speechless I could become or how it would feel to actually stammer & stutter!
But it is all behind us now.
We look forward to today & the rest of our days to come with our chins up & our heads held high.
For today, we begin another chapter.
A new chapter that epitomises the character of strength, willpower & integrity.
Needless to say, it is the epitome of love.
It also reflects that eventhough we do not realise it, even dreams do come true, just probably not in the fashion we want it to be.
The setback has given us a platform to propel ourselves to even higher & more satisfying levels of understanding.
Most importantly, how difficult would it be to be in a living hell when you have your Angel by your side?
The moods that swing up & down have finally touched ground.
There should be no regrets, for love means you do not have to say you're sorry.
So, how's your mood today?
Familiar?
I heard this phrase some time back.
Been thinking, all this while, I am a good practitioner of its essence.
These few days, with so many things happening & all the emotions that have been going to & fro, I was proven wrong.
For a self-proclaimed egolomaniac, I found that I really did not have such a thick face.
Not for the ability to handle rejections, make good emotional judgements and certainly not accepting what I would consider, a defeat.
But the Angel was quick to assure me, it was not a defeat.
It was a matter of circumstances...
The judgement she passed was not going to be not an easy one for her as well.
Ah well...
In the course of all this turmoil, endless hours of soul-searching & heart-wrenching conversations, many people got hurt.
I can only hope that nobody got badly scarred.
Especially those I care for the most.
I would describe myself to be articulate.
I have also been described as a person with exceptional communication skills.
But alas, the Great Communicator has failed to communicate the most basic of needs;
The Need for Love.
There hasn't been many ocassions which I would be caught withot a line to rescue myself out of a situation, but during this ordeal, I was amazed at how speechless I could become or how it would feel to actually stammer & stutter!
But it is all behind us now.
We look forward to today & the rest of our days to come with our chins up & our heads held high.
For today, we begin another chapter.
A new chapter that epitomises the character of strength, willpower & integrity.
Needless to say, it is the epitome of love.
It also reflects that eventhough we do not realise it, even dreams do come true, just probably not in the fashion we want it to be.
The setback has given us a platform to propel ourselves to even higher & more satisfying levels of understanding.
Most importantly, how difficult would it be to be in a living hell when you have your Angel by your side?
The moods that swing up & down have finally touched ground.
There should be no regrets, for love means you do not have to say you're sorry.
So, how's your mood today?
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
When Love & Hate Collide
“Got a time, got a chance, gonna make it; got my hands on your heart gonna take it;
All I know, I can’t fight this way;
You could have a change of heart, if you would only change your mind;
‘Coz I’m crazy bout you baby, time after time…
Without you one night alone;
It’s like a year without you baby, do you have a heart of stone;
Without you, can’t stop the hurt inside…”
Hmm...
Great tune.
Having known this song since my teens, it’s about time it reflects now in my own life.
It’s truly an experience to encounter these extremes of emotions.
Where there is light, there is darkness;
Where there’s life, there’s death.
Where there’s joy, there would be sadness.
But can’t love just prevail without hatred?
This could be one of the most mind-boggling entries in this blog to date.
For those who deciphered the “How Many More 12s”, this could use a bit of mental strength.
For there is no more holding back.
I have done what I do not normally do, let alone imagine I would.
And what I have done would be irreversible, even incomprehensible for a person with an ego like mine.
But I could not care less.
What has to be said has to be said.
What needs to be done cannot wait any longer.
For the sake of my sanity, I will have to pull it through.
And there could be only 2 results:
Love, or, hate.
Am I going nuts?
All I know, I can’t fight this way;
You could have a change of heart, if you would only change your mind;
‘Coz I’m crazy bout you baby, time after time…
Without you one night alone;
It’s like a year without you baby, do you have a heart of stone;
Without you, can’t stop the hurt inside…”
Hmm...
Great tune.
Having known this song since my teens, it’s about time it reflects now in my own life.
It’s truly an experience to encounter these extremes of emotions.
Where there is light, there is darkness;
Where there’s life, there’s death.
Where there’s joy, there would be sadness.
But can’t love just prevail without hatred?
This could be one of the most mind-boggling entries in this blog to date.
For those who deciphered the “How Many More 12s”, this could use a bit of mental strength.
For there is no more holding back.
I have done what I do not normally do, let alone imagine I would.
And what I have done would be irreversible, even incomprehensible for a person with an ego like mine.
But I could not care less.
What has to be said has to be said.
What needs to be done cannot wait any longer.
For the sake of my sanity, I will have to pull it through.
And there could be only 2 results:
Love, or, hate.
Am I going nuts?
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Lyrics to That Song
And if your speakers were not working, or the streaming media's a pain in the butt, the lyrics are here:
Before The Next Teardrop Falls
If he brings you happiness
Then i wish you all the best
It's your happiness that matters most of all
But if he ever breaks your heart
If the teardrops ever start
I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
Si te quire de verdad
Y te da felicidad
Te deseo lo mas bueno pa'los dos
Pero si te hace llorar
A mime puedes hablar
Y estare contigo cuando treste estas
I'll be there anytime
You need me by your side
To drive away every teardrop that you cried
And if he ever leaves you blue
Just remember, I love you
And I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
And I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
Before The Next Teardrop Falls
If he brings you happiness
Then i wish you all the best
It's your happiness that matters most of all
But if he ever breaks your heart
If the teardrops ever start
I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
Si te quire de verdad
Y te da felicidad
Te deseo lo mas bueno pa'los dos
Pero si te hace llorar
A mime puedes hablar
Y estare contigo cuando treste estas
I'll be there anytime
You need me by your side
To drive away every teardrop that you cried
And if he ever leaves you blue
Just remember, I love you
And I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
And I'll be there before the next teardrop falls
Before the Next Teardrop Falls
For someone who hardly cries, just pay attention to the lyrics... :)
Before the Next Teardrop Falls - Freddy Fender
Before the Next Teardrop Falls - Freddy Fender
How Many More 12s?
I posted in FB a while ago the following equation:
12 = 4,380 = 105,120 = 6,307,200.
Only 1 of my friends could figure "6,000,000 odd" meant a long sheep count, that "Even the Devil would be bored"...
Ah, well...
We have our own numbers.
Some love the sight of an 8, others 9.
Like most of the people I know, I personally prefer 7, I somehow feel a kind of attachment to this digit.
But "12" will remain a special number to me.
Nope, it's not the total number of men on the field for a football team (plus the Manager-la!)...
It is not my best personal trait being religious, so neither am I referring to the number of disciples The Great Teacher once had.
And to bet that I am speaking of the face of a time-piece for having the same amount of numbers on it would mean you're buying me dinner.
"12" actually would mean to me cherishable, worthwhile, loyalty, strength, companionship, adversity, unconventional, steadfastness, unspoken understanding...
And the only power to pull all these together could be nothing greater than the power of love.
The countdown lapses every 12.
Mine has started again.
So, what's your favourite number?
12 = 4,380 = 105,120 = 6,307,200.
Only 1 of my friends could figure "6,000,000 odd" meant a long sheep count, that "Even the Devil would be bored"...
Ah, well...
We have our own numbers.
Some love the sight of an 8, others 9.
Like most of the people I know, I personally prefer 7, I somehow feel a kind of attachment to this digit.
But "12" will remain a special number to me.
Nope, it's not the total number of men on the field for a football team (plus the Manager-la!)...
It is not my best personal trait being religious, so neither am I referring to the number of disciples The Great Teacher once had.
And to bet that I am speaking of the face of a time-piece for having the same amount of numbers on it would mean you're buying me dinner.
"12" actually would mean to me cherishable, worthwhile, loyalty, strength, companionship, adversity, unconventional, steadfastness, unspoken understanding...
And the only power to pull all these together could be nothing greater than the power of love.
The countdown lapses every 12.
Mine has started again.
So, what's your favourite number?
Monday, May 18, 2009
"Sunday, Bloody Sunday"...
I know it's Monday already, but what the heck is with the title?
It's been one helluva Sunday, that's why...
Sundays come in many different "settings", "fonts" & "wallpaper"...
For some, it's the day that religious piety is on public display, filial piety with a brunch of dim sum, good home-making skills with a small spring cleaning, etc...
But for others, it would be the day that is best spent alone, running that over-due errant or just simply in front of the idiot box...
However, for me, 17th May 2009 would most probably be written in my books as the day of the awakening.
For the cat's out of the bag, Pandora's box is opened & the sh*t has hit the fan.
Choices we make dictate how we end up, whether good or bad.
There isn't much of a choice after that to like it or not, because in the beginning, the question of whether we would like it was never asked.
Neither were there any guarantee nor "satisfaction-assured" clause that came with the package.
And what a package it would be, for now we know; once in, we can never look back...
Not even when the alternative option presents itself to do so.
It's true when people say: "You can't turn back time to undo what you have done"...
But then again, if the watch does not any longer fit or run according to its intended purpose of existence, I would feel it befits to get something more reliable, not necessarily a new one & walk on.
Rather than have the piece of "time-telling" equipment fail on me & put me in a situation to regret & feel sorry...
And to feel sorry for the next 12 years will be quite an unbearable pain...
What would you do?
It's been one helluva Sunday, that's why...
Sundays come in many different "settings", "fonts" & "wallpaper"...
For some, it's the day that religious piety is on public display, filial piety with a brunch of dim sum, good home-making skills with a small spring cleaning, etc...
But for others, it would be the day that is best spent alone, running that over-due errant or just simply in front of the idiot box...
However, for me, 17th May 2009 would most probably be written in my books as the day of the awakening.
For the cat's out of the bag, Pandora's box is opened & the sh*t has hit the fan.
Choices we make dictate how we end up, whether good or bad.
There isn't much of a choice after that to like it or not, because in the beginning, the question of whether we would like it was never asked.
Neither were there any guarantee nor "satisfaction-assured" clause that came with the package.
And what a package it would be, for now we know; once in, we can never look back...
Not even when the alternative option presents itself to do so.
It's true when people say: "You can't turn back time to undo what you have done"...
But then again, if the watch does not any longer fit or run according to its intended purpose of existence, I would feel it befits to get something more reliable, not necessarily a new one & walk on.
Rather than have the piece of "time-telling" equipment fail on me & put me in a situation to regret & feel sorry...
And to feel sorry for the next 12 years will be quite an unbearable pain...
What would you do?
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Freedom, More of a State of Mind...
Today is a non-working Saturday, being a 2nd weekend.
Usually it would mean that I would be away from the keyboard till the next working day, since I do not fancy being hooked onto anything, except my mobile phone, till then.
Like many others, I'd love to have the ocassional peace & quiet.
But does that mean I am free to do anything I want or go anywhere I like or meet whomever I choose to?
Commitments here & responsibilities there dictate my choices.
So much so that they appear to strangle the very liberty of my being.
I don't seem to be able to do what I really want, go where I'd really want to go or enjoy meeting anyone whom I choose.
Not without paying a certain price.
Just the very motion that I can do certain things without having to worry about repercussions seem so alien to me, conscious or sub-consciously.
I may appear to be one that exudes many qualities & have been described many others as well...
But somehow, freedom eludes me.
I need my space, I want my share of the air, I feel exhausted & I know I am choking...
And I know, it's not a luxury of choice.
What say you?
Usually it would mean that I would be away from the keyboard till the next working day, since I do not fancy being hooked onto anything, except my mobile phone, till then.
Like many others, I'd love to have the ocassional peace & quiet.
But does that mean I am free to do anything I want or go anywhere I like or meet whomever I choose to?
Commitments here & responsibilities there dictate my choices.
So much so that they appear to strangle the very liberty of my being.
I don't seem to be able to do what I really want, go where I'd really want to go or enjoy meeting anyone whom I choose.
Not without paying a certain price.
Just the very motion that I can do certain things without having to worry about repercussions seem so alien to me, conscious or sub-consciously.
I may appear to be one that exudes many qualities & have been described many others as well...
But somehow, freedom eludes me.
I need my space, I want my share of the air, I feel exhausted & I know I am choking...
And I know, it's not a luxury of choice.
What say you?
Friday, May 15, 2009
Again, Thank God It's What Day?
Cold-start morning...
Weekend-to-be drivers...
Monthly Sales Meeting...
Which of the following would be the ideal way to start your day?
What about all of the above?
And surviving them all with a smile on the face.
Today is a historic day for me.
15th May 2009 will go down in the books of History as one of the most symbolic days of my life.
It is today that we would see the acceptance of others towards what we've been striving to achieve, no matter how long the journey, we would be taking it with our heads held high.
It is today also that the testimony of how the level of friendship & brother (& sister)hood has been stretched to bring about the happening of the evening.
And it is today that some people will see the difference between boys & men.
Where most people see separation, we see unity in diversity.
Where most expect failure, we define success with our own dictionary.
Where most will turn away, we hold out our hands & say "Join Us!"
Because in the end, we are all just a piece of our own history...
Do you have your own historic moment?
Weekend-to-be drivers...
Monthly Sales Meeting...
Which of the following would be the ideal way to start your day?
What about all of the above?
And surviving them all with a smile on the face.
Today is a historic day for me.
15th May 2009 will go down in the books of History as one of the most symbolic days of my life.
It is today that we would see the acceptance of others towards what we've been striving to achieve, no matter how long the journey, we would be taking it with our heads held high.
It is today also that the testimony of how the level of friendship & brother (& sister)hood has been stretched to bring about the happening of the evening.
And it is today that some people will see the difference between boys & men.
Where most people see separation, we see unity in diversity.
Where most expect failure, we define success with our own dictionary.
Where most will turn away, we hold out our hands & say "Join Us!"
Because in the end, we are all just a piece of our own history...
Do you have your own historic moment?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Angels or Demons?
And nope, this is not the preview to a certain Blockbuster Movie going on-screen anytime soon.
Far from it.
This is real-life, not fiction.
And to see that this is my second posting in here for today should prove that it's worth a mention...
We see angels as beings with a god-like appearance, fairy-type nice little cute "people".
The closest "resemblance" that we can imagine of an angel is probably the winged beautiful man or woman we see in paintings from the Rennaisance period or the little white thing with wings and a halo hanging from our Christmas Tree.
Angels in real life are far from these pretty pictures...
They may come in any form, likings or behaviour.
However, to truly earn this title, it's more than just a nickname in a forum or an ID in the msn.
The next time somebody gives up a portion of their lives, i.e.: their time, their happiness, their share of the pie, their only available slot of the day for their own use just to be with you to take some of your troubles away; you can proudly say that you have been touched by an angel.
So, remember: angels are real.
Mine smokes, swears, drinks, complaints about close to almost everything, has a "pretty" bad temper (no! not looking pretty while throwing a temper!), gets angry at me! but is fast to forgive...
Lets' just say that the list of better qualities are longer.
She keeps saying that she's just a demon in an angel's disguise, but I'd say she is trying to make herself look like a demon & failing terribly at it...
Lucky me.
I have an angel.
Tell me about yours.
Far from it.
This is real-life, not fiction.
And to see that this is my second posting in here for today should prove that it's worth a mention...
We see angels as beings with a god-like appearance, fairy-type nice little cute "people".
The closest "resemblance" that we can imagine of an angel is probably the winged beautiful man or woman we see in paintings from the Rennaisance period or the little white thing with wings and a halo hanging from our Christmas Tree.
Angels in real life are far from these pretty pictures...
They may come in any form, likings or behaviour.
However, to truly earn this title, it's more than just a nickname in a forum or an ID in the msn.
The next time somebody gives up a portion of their lives, i.e.: their time, their happiness, their share of the pie, their only available slot of the day for their own use just to be with you to take some of your troubles away; you can proudly say that you have been touched by an angel.
So, remember: angels are real.
Mine smokes, swears, drinks, complaints about close to almost everything, has a "pretty" bad temper (no! not looking pretty while throwing a temper!), gets angry at me! but is fast to forgive...
Lets' just say that the list of better qualities are longer.
She keeps saying that she's just a demon in an angel's disguise, but I'd say she is trying to make herself look like a demon & failing terribly at it...
Lucky me.
I have an angel.
Tell me about yours.
Familiar Face?
The May Issue of ExtremeKARS printed a write-up & photographs of the Sept 28th 2008 excursion of my "previously actively involved" car club; TeamCity, to Seremban.
Since I organised it, I called it "Seremban 928 Jalan Jalan Cari Makan Trip"...
I could still recall all the anxiety & effort involved into making this trip such a success.
It was indeed a great experience.
Eventhough long over-due, the magazine gave a close & precise coverage, eventhough simple, of the Event.
My buddy & TeamCity mates from Sban should also get credit for this coverage.
And this appearance in the magazine is my 2nd, but it's the 1st to ever see my name printed...
What a moment.
And I finally bought a copy yesterday at a news stand.
Here I was, looking at the page of the coverage to make sure I did not get the wrong copy while the stand owner looked at me.
"Hey, that's you" he said...
"Yup, that's me, with my name on it. Since my name & picture are in this mag, do I get this issue FREE?"...
Haha... tough luck...
Merely trying to make conversation & probably be able to make away with a free copy, but nice try I guess...
Wouldn't you have done the same?
Since I organised it, I called it "Seremban 928 Jalan Jalan Cari Makan Trip"...
I could still recall all the anxiety & effort involved into making this trip such a success.
It was indeed a great experience.
Eventhough long over-due, the magazine gave a close & precise coverage, eventhough simple, of the Event.
My buddy & TeamCity mates from Sban should also get credit for this coverage.
And this appearance in the magazine is my 2nd, but it's the 1st to ever see my name printed...
What a moment.
And I finally bought a copy yesterday at a news stand.
Here I was, looking at the page of the coverage to make sure I did not get the wrong copy while the stand owner looked at me.
"Hey, that's you" he said...
"Yup, that's me, with my name on it. Since my name & picture are in this mag, do I get this issue FREE?"...
Haha... tough luck...
Merely trying to make conversation & probably be able to make away with a free copy, but nice try I guess...
Wouldn't you have done the same?
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Wow... what an effort...
After like, almost 10 months, here I am again...
Still brain-drained, dunno what to write.
But also, coz something big is happening soon, so busy preparing for it.
However, the joy of having great people as brothers & sisters means there still so much to look forward to.
Watch this space...
Still brain-drained, dunno what to write.
But also, coz something big is happening soon, so busy preparing for it.
However, the joy of having great people as brothers & sisters means there still so much to look forward to.
Watch this space...
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