Brother, TaiKor, AhNeh, Hia Dee...

"Men who achieve great heights are seldom brought together based on common interests; it is in the differences which they work through that brings them to the scales which they reach..."


I have a brother whom I did not choose.
He came into the family through my Mom 3 years after I did.

There went my spotlight which I have had enjoyed for the first 3 years of my life.
Suddenly, it wasn’t only about me anymore.
Whenever there was a whimper, Mom & Dad or whomever were paying their "finally I managed to grab" attention to me earlier just scurry to his side to see if everything is ok.

They would also compliment on how he seemed a little bit cuter than I was when I was new-born in a different dialect or language, thinking I would not get what it was that they were saying.

"Hello.
I am 3 years old lah."

By then I had picked up 3 dialects & 3 different languages...


He grew up with his set of challenges, both to my parents & to himself.

However, all I could say today is that:
"Well, I may not have had a choice earlier, but given one, I would probably still want you as my brother..."

I use "probably", coz I am sure he should know that there are instances in which he could have done better.


Dude, don’t give up.
Keep trying.
You can do it!

After all, you’re my blood brother; so how much worse off could you get?

Hahaha... :)


There are also brothers of a different kind.
Those whom we get to choose.
Maybe in the beginning they are merely acquaintances.
But after a while & the things you go through together, you become friends.

The time will come when the level is raised when challenges you face together or happiness you share bring you closer.
It would also feel rather uncomfortable when you don’t meet each other for a certain period of time & feel something is missing in your usual self.
That’s when you realise that they have touched your lives & that they truly deserve a special place in your heart.
These guys, through your choosing, become your brothers.

I have been described as a person who picks his company very fervently.
I may not be very friendly at times & I do not practice discretion when displaying this fact.

But there is a band-of-brothers whom I trust with my life.

Literally.

For the things that we have gone through together are really experiences which money cannot buy.
That is exactly why, recently, I was saddened that before I was given an opportunity to utter my grievances, I felt judged on my current actions & inactions.

However, having faith that they would understand, I chose to unmask myself & let them see that I have not changed, just some situations & circumstances have adjusted themselves & I still am who they are comfortable being with.

What you see is what you get.
Nothing to hide.
Just good old FF.


God loves me.
Otherwise He would not have put me in the company of this group of kind-hearted people.

People I care for as much as they care for me.
People who trust that I carry the best of their interests at heart & carry mine in theirs.
People whom I am certain will be there with me no matter thick or thin, doing whatever they can in their capacity for what I believe in.

These people whom I call brothers of different mothers.


I love you all.

Ring, ring... Hello?!?!

"If it is true that you’re happy for someone about something, be genuine about it. For their true happiness may very well depend on yours..."


Let me illustrate.

If somebody matters so much to you that their state-of-mind is a concern of yours, watch your own.
Because, the slightest emotion you may have or how feel towards something may influence that person’s emotions as well...

From a line of Barry Manilow’s classic:
"I feel glad, when you’re glad;
Feel sad when you’re sad..."

Makes sense?

Simple, time & again we hear that to maintain that somebody is happy, we must be happy with their decisions, be happy for them, and so on so forth.
Easier said than done most of the time; because it actually hurt us to see the other person’s happiness especially if it does not involve us.
But we learn to let go.


However, time & again, we are not spared from the instances when we overlook this simple truth.
That we ignore the very fact that a basic reaction we have towards an incident would bring so much discomfort to that somebody.

Even as the masters of the top of the food chain, acknowledged as being the most intelligent & intellectual of all of God’s creation, we human seek a few things from that someone that we would not usually seek elsewhere; attention, affection, care, concern, loyalty, truthfulness, respect, honour, the list can go on & on & on…

But all these would not be possible if the one single most important element is missing: recognition.

It’s been said that this is the thing that men die for & babies cry for...


Simple things, such as calling them by their affectionate nicknames would change the mood in so many ways.
I am sure by now you would have heard couples calling each other "baby", "honey", "sweetheart", "darling", etc...
(Feel a little mushy, don't you?)


Ever wondered why it's important?
Because everybody else would call them by their actual names.
It is that special someone who would address them as affectionately as you would by their nicknames, if you are up for it.

Of course, this step requires discretion; otherwise it will create a high-resonance sting in the ear if misused too often.


Then we figure: "What is the significance of the wedding ring?"
It’s been called many names; the love-band, the love-bond, etc, when it simply means to address the tying of the knot...

Some ladies wear one to ward off unwanted attention, especially when they’re on a night out on a prowl.
Most men would not wear theirs, hoping that the hot chick across the table would notice that they are still "S&A".

I have heard cases where arguments take place because either party has misplaced the ring.
There were even rumours that couples get all psyched up because of this issue of losing it, thinking it actually reveals how much they regard the marriage in the first place.

But it should only be seen as a form of recognition.
When the wearer feels that the love is gone, then, where is the bond?
Why should there still be a band?
What knot are we still talking about?


They say time heals all wounds.
Time is also a good way to prove a lot of things.
Time will also show the truth in many issues.


Get a good watch to look out for it.

Want a Tag?

Of Pigeons, Cats & the Privacy of the Bat-Cave...

"Don’t lose hope; for when the sun goes down, the stars come out..."


It’s been a heck of a 48-hour period of my life.

For one thing, I didn’t know that love is also bad for the big toe.
And when it gets hurt, there is no description to the emotions that run through my heart & mind, the shiver that tingles though my spine & the guilt that burns a hole in the soul.

Moving couches would never be the same again.
That’s why they were made such, so that we don’t move them time & again unnecessarily.

If it’s any comfort, it was a good thing that the nearest hypermarket was retailing "the comfort food of all comfort food" at a reasonable enough price that I could afford to stock up.


Maybe it’s true when people say: "Behind every cloud, there is a silver lining."
For everything that happens, there is bound to be a reason behind it.


It could be that the "pigeon" saw the injury & is able to understand the significance of it, because finally, it has agreed to let go & move on.
At last, the Angel could breathe a big heavy sigh of relief.

Needless to say, being ecstatic would be an understatement.
But how could I put on a display of happiness when someone else’s has just ended?


Ironic, isn’t it?
Tell me about it.

But it has to happen in this fashion, because there is not enough pie to go around, somebody is bound to go home hungry.
And in this case, eventhough I was not first in line, I dare say that I have proven to be the more befitting & deserving starved one to be given the final slice.

But it was supposed to be one of the happiest evenings of my life.


That was until I heard the doorbell & found out that cats knew how to use elevators.
The very fact that my sanctuary has been trespassed & its sanctity breached speaks volume of the roller coaster I was experiencing.

And how the heck did Cat-woman manage to infiltrate the security measures taken to keep people out of the Bat-cave still eludes my comprehension.

Of course, we cannot expect cats to understand simple human languages especially when sanity is the last of their virtue at this very moment.
Seeing Angel at the Bat-cave did not help in hitting home reality into the mind of the feline.
Probably that’s what caused the paws to retract to reveal sharp claws & the fangs were on public display.

After almost an hour of verbal wrestling, (or whatever it was supposed to be called), I managed to make the feline leave peacefully, but not without a threat that cats have nine lives & that I have not seen the last of her...

Oh well, we’ll see...


What a waste to an otherwise superb evening.


This is it.
A "New Beginning" that I have been harping on & on about.

But it won’t really take off unless I finish clearing my dumpster of unwanted feline faeces.


Cat litter, anyone?


***Disclaimer: No animals have been hurt in the production of this entry. But if it goes on like this, the author could offer no guarantee...***

Yes, No, Maybe...

"Some people are like pigeons; they sh*t on everyone & everything but still refuse to leave..."


Especially when they are comfortable.
Even more so when they have been taking for granted that the things they have had in life will not be taken away from them, because to these people, it is not their fault that things happen the way they had.


Sometimes we wonder what it takes for these people to even wake up from their unending slumber of a perfect world.
For most probably since it’s been ingrained in their shallow or near-to-zero level of mentality to cling on to things even when the meaning is lost.

What truly makes it worse is the fact that in the process of trying to prove their point, bridges are burnt, doors are closed, trust is broken & destiny is sealed.


What is then the real purpose of not letting go?
Who are they trying to fool that things will still change for the better?
When will they ever learn that there is no way to turn back time?
Why can’t they see that there isn’t hope anymore in this comfort zone of theirs?


If you are truthful & sincere in their happiness, let go.
Let them live as they want.
If that’s the only way to their happiness, never doubt that this is the way it should be.
Move out of the comfort zone, that space which you have already taken for granted for so many years.
Allow change to move your lives.
Before things get worse, since more things done or more words exchanged would only bring unhappiness into your lives.


Be certain then, that whatever is left would be memories worth cherishing.
And be glad that there was once love.